Every woman who came before you eventually left him. With every new person who walked into his life, he already knew they’d eventually walk out on him.
And they did, to the point where he became intimately familiar with that painful feeling. He started to believe that every new person would act the same way and there’s nothing he could do about it.
When he accidentally stumbled upon you, he couldn’t even imagine that you would spend this much time with him. He expected you to leave a long time ago. To his surprise, you’re still here.
But since he’s so used to watching everyone go, your partner now has serious abandonment issues. He has this fear that you’ll leave him like all the others, and that’s why he’ll do whatever he can to prevent that from happening again.
You might not understand the reason for his behavior, but you should keep in mind that he’s been left many times in the past. Right now, he can’t control his fear, no matter how hard he tries.
So, if he does any of the following things, then it’s clear that his abandonment issues are taking a toll on him and your relationship.
1. He avoids arguments
Your partner probably thinks that if the two of you were to end up in an argument, you’d probably leave him. He has this idea in mind that couples who fight usually end up breaking up.
So to make sure you won’t break up with him, he does whatever it takes to avoid an argument. No matter the issue, he’ll do anything and everything just so the two of you don’t end up arguing.
In the long run, this only makes your relationship fragile and increases the chances of falling apart. But he doesn’t see things that way.
Instead, he believes that if you don’t ever fight, it only means that you’re happy. What he doesn’t get, though, is that all of the issues only keep piling up under the rug and at one point, someone’s going to trip on them.
2. He always tries to keep you happy, even when he’s not in the mood
Even when he’s not in the mood, he’ll do his best to see you smiling. By doing so, he believes he’s only prolonging your stay in his life.
The happier you feel around him, the lower the chances that you’ll leave him. That’s the way he thinks.
But the main issue is that he often forgets about his own feelings. He ignores the fact that even when he’s not in the mood, he still forces himself to be there for you and cheer you up.
By doing so, he neglects his own emotions and pretends like he’s doing great when the reality is far from that.
3. He constantly asks you if everything’s okay
A partner who has abandonment issues will always check on you to see if everything’s okay. He’ll make sure that you haven’t changed your mind about him and that you still like him the same way.
Sometimes, you get tired of having to answer the same questions day after day. You don’t understand why he feels this need to always check on you when it’s obvious that you’d let him know if you changed your mind about anything.
But it’s because he’s been left many times in the past, and probably without any explanation. His previous girlfriends simply walked away from him, without letting him know what was going on.
That’s why he always asks you if everything’s right because he wants to make sure you won’t do the same as those before you. He’s afraid of having his heart broken yet again and he wants to prevent that from happening.
4. He never says no to you
Your partner is a people pleaser and he doesn’t feel comfortable saying no to you. The reason for this is that he doesn’t want you to leave him. He believes you’ll turn your back on him if he doesn’t make your every single wish come true.
That’s why you’ll hear him saying yes to you even when it’s almost impossible to make your wishes come true. By doing so, he believes you won’t leave him, which is something he fears the most.
5. He profusely apologizes, even when it’s totally unnecessary
Your partner will always make sure to apologize to you, even when it isn’t his fault. You’ll hear him saying sorry for the things that he shouldn’t even be sorry for.
He’s reached the point where he blames himself for everything and thinks that apologizing to you will make you stay with him longer. He believes that if he was to blame you for something, you’d pack your things and leave, which is the last thing he wants to happen.
So, to save himself from ending up in that scenario, he makes sure he’s always the first one to apologize. Even when you tell him that he shouldn’t take the blame of others onto himself, he can’t help it.
This is his way of keeping you closer and you can’t make him change his behavior. It’s deeply rooted that he’s the cause of all of the issues he’s facing and that’s why he obsessively apologizes even when he’s the innocent party.
6. He buys you gifts for no particular reason
Does your partner always buy you gifts, even when there’s no special occasion? Every time you meet up to hang out, he brings you a small gift.
You’ve told him multiple times that although it’s sweet, you don’t expect him to buy you presents as that’s not why you’re in a relationship with him. But still, he keeps doing so, no matter what you say.
The reason he does this is that he’s trying to show you how much he cares about you. He believes he needs to express his love in every way possible and that’s why he always brings you something. He’s hoping you realize how much he cares about you so that you won’t break up with him.
No matter how many times you tell him that you’re not going anywhere, his fear of abandonment is making it hard to believe.
That’s why he acts in all these ways only to make you stay as long as possible.
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