We’re all well aware of the red flags that we should look for in every relationship. Once you spot them, you run away from the guy as fast as your feet can take you.
If you realize that a guy you’ve been dating keeps lying to you, you immediately know that he’s fishy and you can’t trust him. If you see that he’s got other girls on the side, you know he’s a player and up to no good.
But what about the supposed green flags – the ones that aren’t actually that green when you think about them? To be honest, they’re more likely to be burning red once you get to the bottom of the issue.
Sometimes, certain behavior in a relationship might seem like a good thing. You might think that your guy is caring and romantic, but is he really?
I know it sounds confusing but let me explain what I’m talking about.
Here are some of the seemingly green flags that are actually red. After you read through them, think about whether your current partner is showing signs of any of these behaviors.
Buckle up – this could end up being a bumpy ride.
1. He seems interested in what you have to say and doesn’t talk much
It’s nice to feel like you’re being listened to. To see that your partner is actually absorbing every single word that comes out of your mouth.
Seems like a total green flag, right? What’s there to worry about?
But think about it for a second. Are you the one speaking the whole time? Is he never bothered to develop a real conversation with you?
Instead, he lets you do the talking, and then when you’re done, he starts talking about himself.
And does it seem that for everything you said, he had a story from his life that was much more interesting?
To me, it sounds like you’re dealing with a self-centered guy who only comes across as if he’s listening to you.
Instead, he’s actually waiting for you to stop talking so he can go on with his little rant about himself.
2. He showers you with compliments all the time
Who’d say compliments are a red flag? Not even a fool, right?
We all look for a man who’ll shower us with compliments and now that you’ve finally found one, I’m telling you that he’s a bad guy and that his honeyed words should be seen as a red flag.
I know that it makes no sense right now, but bear with me.
It’s okay if a guy gives you compliments – we all live for that.
But does it feel that for everything you do, he has a compliment to give?
A nice word that makes you feel like you’re the most perfect girl and exactly what he’s looking for.
Especially if this happens at the very beginning of a relationship, while you don’t even know each other that well.
If a guy keeps showering you with compliments all the time, chances are he’s love-bombing you.
I mean, he doesn’t even know you, but he already knows that you’re perfect for him? Makes no sense.
But if he’s trying to win you over, then in his head, everything sounds perfectly reasonable.
Just don’t let your initial infatuation with him blind you to his actions.
3. He always wants to take your relationship to the next level
It sounds nice to finally find a guy who’s not afraid of taking your relationship to the next level.
He’s not afraid of introducing you to his parents and showing you off to his friends.
At first, you might love this. But once you start thinking about it, you may realize that he’s actually taking things too fast for your liking and you’re letting him do that.
He probably took you by surprise and you had no chance to react.
Maybe you aren’t comfortable with this pace but because it all played out so fast, you never said anything.
The point is that a guy who keeps taking this faster than its usual pace probably has something to hide.
He’s either using you for an ulterior motive or he’s playing some sort of mind game with you.
Whatever it is, be on the lookout. Find out his real intentions and don’t let him play with your feelings.
4. He started bragging about you on social media from the very start
Most women nowadays are elated when a man shows them off on his social media.
In today’s modern world, it’s a sign that a man is truly invested in his relationship and doesn’t care about other women.
But if the moment you start going out, he posts an Instagram pic of the two of you and changes his relationship status on Facebook, then there might be something wrong.
Is he rushing things because you’re just a rebound and he’s trying to show his ex that he’s moved on? He might just be.
5. He never stops texting you
It’s an obvious red flag if a man ignores your texts or takes a long time to reply – he probably doesn’t want to have anything with you or has someone on the side who’s keeping him occupied.
But what’s with a guy who texts you constantly, without letting you breathe properly? Is he caring or controlling?
If you see that he gets upset because you haven’t replied to his text the very instant you got it, then you might want to question your decision to be in a relationship with him.
He’s probably a controlling, manipulative man who won’t ever change because he doesn’t see that he’s making a mistake.
6. He’s always taking the lead
It’s nice to meet a guy who knows what he wants for a change.
He has your date nights planned in detail – he’s set the time, place, and where you’ll go after dinner.
But the moment you ask him to do something that you want, he gets upset and ignores you.
Seems like your guy isn’t as perfect as you thought. Instead, he’s actually trying to control you so you keep doing what he expects you to.
The second you opt for something that doesn’t match up with his expectations, you’ll see what drama looks like.
So, if you notice that your current guy is showing some of these behaviors, know that it’s far from green flags.
He’s using you for selfish purposes and these seemingly green flags are in fact burning red.