When people say that you need to stay single after a breakup, you probably starting wondering if you have time to lose.
Especially at a certain age, we believe that we’re just wasting our time on being single. We’ve been taught that unless we’re loved by another person, there’s nothing for us to look forward to in life.
This isn’t true in the slightest. You should really stay single after a breakup. And here’s why.
1. You get to analyze what went wrong
When you just jump from one relationship into the next, you don’t have time to analyze your previous relationship. Thinking about what went wrong and assessing the things that were said and done are crucial right now.
You can’t just climb straight into a new relationship without getting closure from the previous one. And the only way you can get closure right now is if you genuinely take some time for yourself and think about it.
Think of all the reasons that led to your breakup. If he was the one to leave you, figure out if the issue was with you or with him.
Think about the ways you reacted to the things he said or did and how you can improve them in your next relationship.
This is actually the perfect time for you to go through these thoughts and emotions without dragging someone new into the situation.
2. You learn things about yourself
How long has it been since you’ve been single? It’s probably been years at this point. You’ve grown so much, and changed since then because you were in a relationship.
But who are you without that relationship? What are your own goals, dreams, and aspirations? What do you want from this life and where do you see yourself in the future?
All of the answers to these questions involved your partner when you were together. Now you have to answer them with just yourself in mind.
This is the perfect moment to get to know yourself all over again. Who are you when you’re not in a relationship?
When you start getting to know yourself on your own, without someone to influence you, you’ll learn to fall in love with yourself.
3. You get a break from all the drama
Let’s be honest and admit that the dating scene nowadays is filled with drama. So many men out there are still not over their exes, they’re not ready to commit, and so on.
And even if they are, you still have to go through a lot of stuff just to be able to start a relationship with that person.
So now that you’re out of the relationship that was probably also jam-packed with drama, you feel like you’re missing out on something. The lack of drama has created a void in your own life.
But that doesn’t mean that you should go and actively seek out drama for yourself. If anything, you should learn how to live without it, embrace your peace, and be happy with your life.
Consider this your own little break from all the drama that was surrounding you for a very long time.
4. You learn how to be independent
I’m not saying that you were completely codependent in your relationship, I’m just saying that now you’re learning how to be completely independent.
When you’re in a relationship, you invariably rely on your partner for a lot. You depend on him to be your shoulder to cry on, to be there for you when you need to get through something, or to just help you around the house.
Sometimes, we rely on our partners more than we realize. That’s why I’m telling you right now that this is the perfect opportunity for you to learn how to be completely independent.
There’s nothing wrong with relying on people. You will need your friends and family now more than ever, but you will also learn how to be alone with your sadness. You’ll learn how to go through life (even for just a while) all by yourself.
This is your time to learn that you don’t need anyone.
5. You set higher standards for your future partner
When you’re alone for a longer period of time, it takes you a lot more to let someone in.
Don’t get me wrong. No one is telling you that you can’t date casually when you’re single.
By all means, go out and meet new people. You can figure out what you actually do and don’t want from a relationship. Exactly because of that, you’ll be able to create high standards for yourself.
You’ll be able to detect red flags easier. You can even make your own list of red flags that are authentic to you.
Of course, no person is perfect, but you deserve as close to perfection as there is. So why not set your standards high to the point where your next partner will truly be the one for you?
You have that power now. Use it.
6. You will fall in love with your life again
When you’re single for a while, you fall in love with your life. You fall in love with yourself and all the things that you’re able to give to yourself.
You can’t tell me that you didn’t have entire emotional breakdowns because of your relationship. It made you miserable to the point where you couldn’t even enjoy your life the way you wanted to.
Now it’s time to put all that misery aside and fall in love with your life. One day that happiness will include another person, but for now, be your own happy place.
Be the woman who does anything in this world to make herself happy. Because if you’re not able to be happy on your own, you won’t be able to be happy when you’re in a relationship.