As if manipulation tactics couldn’t get more bizarre, there is one that we need to watch out for very closely: love bombing.
When you meet someone and you fall for them, you want them to show you how much they can love you.
You want to be pampered and spoiled rotten. It’s not because you’re selfish, but because you know that you deserve just that.
You will spoil your partner as well, but he needs to show the same amount of love. Can showing love and affection actually be a manipulation technique, though?
Love bombing is a manipulation strategy that narcissists use to overwhelm their victims with love and affection. It’s used in order to gain their trust and make them more compliant.
That’s why we’ve compiled a list of signs you can look out for to know whether your guy’s love bombing you.
If you really do see these signs, it doesn’t have to mean that your partner is doing it intentionally or that he’s toxic. In these situations, it’s very hard to differentiate reality from fiction.
However, I believe that you can trust your gut feeling on this one. That feeling will just be confirmed if you see these signs.
1. He compliments you a lot
Everyone craves validation, don’t we? We want to know that we’re admired.
When the guy you’re seeing compliments you, you really need to be aware of the bigger picture, however.
How long have you been talking? Has it just been a little while and he’s already showering you with compliments?
Those compliments may include:
“You’re so beautiful. I have never met someone this perfect.”
“Your eyes are so gorgeous, I don’t think I’ve ever seen eyes like yours.”
Or it could be anything along those lines really.
Such phrases sound so perfect and when they come from the lips of the person you’re crushing on, they’re like heaven.
But if these compliments are constant, they lose their meaning, especially if you’ve just started talking or dating.
2. He gets upset over boundaries
His tsunami of affection is overwhelming and when you tell him to slow down, he gets upset with you.
This man actually gets mad at you when you tell him to give you space. He’ll get especially agitated when you say that you don’t want him to touch you.
Is this really a man who loves you or someone who’s love bombing you?
He doesn’t want you to put up boundaries that’ll deny him access to you or hold him back from showing you affection.
This only means that he doesn’t respect you, at all. If he really cared about you, he would respect your wishes.
He will probably put you in an uncomfortable position and he’ll manipulate you into believing that you should always let him touch you.
This is an obvious sign of love bombing and you need to stay away from this man.
3. He buys you many gifts
This type of love bombing is extremely dangerous in the long run.
One reason is that it may lead to him making you feel guilty for wanting to take a break or anything similar.
He’ll say things like: “What about all those things I bought for you? You are so ungrateful!”
The gifts he sends are excessive and extremely inappropriate, so he will send you lingerie or huge bouquets of flowers to your workplace, and it doesn’t matter how awkward they make you feel, he doesn’t stop.
He might have even booked an entire vacation for the two of you and now he’s not taking no for an answer.
He doesn’t care that you have other important things to do.
This is a very scary and dangerous sign of love bombing.
4. He floods your phone with texts and calls
How often does he text you? Is he just texting you to check on you or is he spamming your phone with messages?
What happens when you don’t answer him for five minutes? I bet he calls you right away to ask you why you’re not replying.
This is an obvious sign of love bombing, just as much as it is a sign of an overly possessive boyfriend.
He might even tell you to keep a location-sharing app on at all times so that he can track you.
You appreciate that he worries, but this is just overwhelming.
When you go out with your friends, they’re probably always irritated at you for being on your phone all the time.
They don’t understand how mad he gets when you don’t reply to him.
He says that it’s because he cares about you and he’s scared for you. However, your gut is telling you the truth, so you know that it’s not true.
5. He moves too fast
Everyone wants to know where things are going once they first start talking to someone.
You want to make sure that you both want the same thing from this interaction.
But he seems to move a bit faster than you’d like.
Not just a little bit, it’s actually like he’s sprinting somewhere, while you’re trying to take things slowly.
It’s a real sign of love bombing when he comes off too strong.
He said he loved you a week into dating and he’s already asking you to be his girlfriend.
You want to get to know him better, but he insists that there’s enough time for that.
A narcissist does this in order to trap his victim and guilt-trip her into staying with him.
What you need to understand is that infatuation is a real thing, but it’s not enough to make someone move this fast.
When someone is moving too quickly for their own good, you should really ask yourself what their true intentions are.
6. He wants all your time and attention
At first, you thought that his pouty face was cute. It would appear whenever you were talking to your friends over the phone or working.
However, it’s not that fun when he’s always upset just because you’re reading a book and you’re not all over him.
He’s trying to cut every other thing out of your life, so that you can just focus on him. This is a dangerous game he’s playing.
I know that this can seem sweet, but it’s love bombing at its finest.
Someone who actually loves you wouldn’t want you to put everything aside just because they’re bored.
He wants you to focus on him because he’s needy and probably doesn’t have a life of his own.
This isn’t true love. This is love bombing and love never looks like this.