Being in love is the most thrilling and beautiful experience that a person can have. But that’s easier said than done.
In most cases, we spend most of our lives searching for the right partner. Someone who’ll love us with all their heart and be our shoulder to cry on when everyone else leaves us.
But how do you find the right man for you? How can you know that he’s your soulmate if he keeps pulling away and then reappearing like nothing ever happened? And what could possibly be the reason for men distancing themselves from you?
You may think that everything is black and white when it comes to love, but that’s not true. A man’s mind is a tricky thing since men and women are wired differently. The reason your previous relationships may have ended badly is that you failed to understand each other’s behavior.
Maybe some of your exes were players and toxic manipulators whose only intention was to use you and take you for granted. Even though that seems like a plausible reason for them disappearing and then reappearing, there are always a few exceptions to this rule.
1. He isn’t keen on having a real relationship
Some men are pretty bad with words, while others are true magicians and they know how to keep you in the dark when it comes to their emotions.
That’s why some men try to confuse you and never say directly to your face whether or not they want a relationship with you.
Basically, they will keep you in limbo for as long as they can. He may act all perfect to you, but that’s only what’s going on the surface.
Does he give you the illusion that you two have a deep and meaningful connection? Does he give you all of his attention and is super careful when you two are alone?
If so, he may be saying those things yet still not ready to start a romantic relationship with you.
Truth be told, he’ll never be willing to take such a risk and just keep stringing you along.
Keep in mind that you don’t want to be heartbroken again, so you have to have zero tolerance if a man acts like this. Remember, you decide who’s going to be in and out of your life – not him.
2. He has trust issues
Not all men are players and toxic manipulators who only want to use you to feed their ego. It could be that the guy you’ve been dating was involved with someone who broke him emotionally.
He might be leaving and coming back to you because he developed certain trust issues that are keeping him from completely falling in love with you. That’s another possible reason why men distance themselves.
Although you’re well aware of his past and you can relate to his pain, you can’t be playing games like this forever. You’ve also been emotionally broken, but you learned how to get back on your feet again.
You finally decided to give love another chance, but you can’t help him with his trust issues. He has to deal with them on his own as you did.
3. He doesn’t know how he feels about you
Sometimes men need to take a step back and have more time and space to figure out if they even have feelings for you.
It might sound strange to you because you’re old-fashioned and believe that if it’s meant to be then there’s nothing to think about, but that doesn’t apply to all men.
You can never know what he’s thinking or how his mind works. If you believe this is why he keeps disappearing from your life, then the worst thing you can do is to chase after him.
Some guys may use this mind game to lure you into their trap, but that’s only the case if you’re dealing with a toxic manipulator.
The best solution would be to give him as much space and time as he needs to think things through. Play hard to get, no matter how difficult it is.
Just don’t tolerate his behavior for too long as you’re only going to end up heartbroken.
4. His focus is on other things
It’s a well-known fact that many men are career-oriented and they really put an emphasis on achieving their goals and dreams.
So, another possible explanation for him coming in and out of your life could be that his mind is occupied by other things besides you.
Maybe his work is stressing him out and he doesn’t have time to think about his love life. It may also be that he has some health issues or family problems that he’s prioritizing over you.
Either way, there’s a mess inside of his head and he can’t think about you or your relationship right now.
I know that you want to help him – it’s only natural to want to help a person in need – but there’s nothing you can do if he doesn’t allow you.
He has to sort out his life on his own before he’s ready for a real relationship with you – or anyone else, for that matter.
5. He’s afraid to commit
It may seem to you that every other guy has commitment issues these days and that they’re not ready for a love relationship. They think that being in a relationship means sacrificing your freedom, which is not true at all.
It could be that he’s an immature boy who didn’t have the opportunity to fully grow into a real man. After all, being devoted to just one person isn’t something that many men are prepared to do.
If you see that he has commitment issues, well, there’s nothing you can do about it. There’s no point in giving him any chances because he’ll just continue his noncommittal behavior.
He has commitment phobia and you have to leave him before he shatters your heart into a million pieces.