We love pointing out the flaws of men while we keep ours well-hidden. Although we don’t want the rest of the male population to know about the mistakes we make, the time has come for us to face them.
I know it’s hard admitting to yourself that your behavior isn’t perfect, but it’s time to change it. If you want to grow as a person and become a better version of yourself, then you must face the truth.
I’m sure you’re guilty of acting in the following passive-aggressive ways since almost every woman I know is familiar with them. We use these methods to try and change our men while refusing to acknowledge just how toxic this behavior is.
So, if you want to find out if you’re one of the many women who express these passive-aggressive patterns, then keep on reading. I’m sure you’re guilty of the following the same way I am.
1. Giving him the silent treatment
You get upset with your partner for some reason, but instead of letting him know what’s bothering you, you simply stay quiet. You shut down and avoid talking to him altogether.
Even though he’s in the same room as you are, you still pretend he’s not around. You ignore him without giving him an explanation why and you simply wait for him to realize what he’s done wrong.
Sometimes, the reason for your silent treatment could be that you don’t know how to express your emotions. But whatever the case, this behavior is highly toxic.
I know that you won’t approach your boyfriend and admit to him the mistake you’ve been making. But as long as you’re willing to put in some effort and replace the silent treatment with words, you’ll significantly help your relationship move forward.
It’s efficient to stay quiet and make your partner figure out what’s wrong. This behavior makes him scared of losing you and that’s why he won’t waste time, waiting for you to speak out.
But still, it’s unhealthy and brings a dose of toxicity into your relationship. That’s why you should work on changing it.
2. Making sarcastic comments
Sarcasm usually counts as a form of passive-aggressive behavior. Instead of being vocal about what made you upset, you simply use a sarcastic tone of voice to convey the message.
It makes you feel as if you explained to your partner the mistakes he’s made without directly pointing them out. But honestly, you’re only making the situation worse.
He’ll probably feel offended by your behavior and then you’ll use the excuse that you haven’t said anything wrong. In reality, both of us know what you wanted to achieve by making such a comment.
Being sarcastic allows you an easy way out, but it’s time to grow up and do what’s right for your relationship. It’s always better to talk to your partner honestly, without sarcasm, as that would make it easier for him to fix his mistakes.
Plus, he’ll feel that you actually care about your relationship and want to make it work when you openly tell him what’s wrong. Everything else counts as playing games and manipulation.
And those aren’t ways to build a healthy relationship, but surefire ways to destroy it.
3. Criticizing him all the time
We all have our flaws and you can’t expect your boyfriend to change out of the blue. Especially if you knew what you were getting yourself into when you met him.
So, criticizing your partner all the time and expecting him to change himself for you isn’t healthy at all. It’s passive-aggressive behavior that you should avoid at all costs.
If you at any point feel like he doesn’t make you happy, you have every right to walk away. Break up with him and find someone who’ll give you everything you expect from a partner.
But to think that you can shape him by your standards and make him fit into your mold is wrong on so many levels. Honestly, you wouldn’t like it if he was to treat you the same way as you treat him. So, stop making all these comments, criticizing everything he does.
If he turns out to be different from what you were looking for, then you have every right to either discuss it with him like an adult or end the relationship. But pointing out every little thing he does wrong won’t do the trick and it certainly won’t help your relationship.
4. Being constantly grumpy
When your partner asks you what’s wrong and you tell him “nothing,” when in reality you’re deeply upset about something, that behavior is called passive-aggressive. Instead of having a talk with him, you decide to stay grumpy and respond to his every word in an angry manner.
Even though he wants to help you feel better and fix the mistakes he’s made (if there are any), he doesn’t know how to do that. Your behavior isn’t allowing him to do so since you don’t want to tell him what’s wrong.
All grumpy, you mope or stomp around the house, dissatisfied with everything that stands in your way. The loud TV, the slow washer that’s taking hours to finish a cycle, and the noisy neighbors having a BBQ in their backyard.
All these things irritate you since you’re upset about something you don’t want to reveal. And instead of having a conversation with your partner, you keep acting all grumpy until he magically finds out what’s wrong with you (which of course, never happens.)
Let me assure you, if you keep acting this way all the time, your partner will get sick of you. Your behavior only pushes him away and shows him you’re the kind of person he doesn’t want to be with.
So, if you don’t want to lose your boyfriend, then it’s time for you to stop acting like a child. These passive-aggressive behavioral patterns are only harming your relationship.
Whatever issues you have can’t resolve magically just by refusing to talk about them. So, you better verbalize your emotions or you’ll lose someone who cares about you.
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