When you talk to men, they give the impression that they’d feel comfortable dating ambitious women. They act as if they’d do whatever it takes to find someone who knows how to take care of herself and doesn’t need a man’s help through life.
But reality seems to be different.
Even though we no longer live in the era where women are expected to stay at home and take care of the kids, some things still haven’t changed. Most men aren’t willing to admit it, but they’re terrified of dating a woman who earns more than them.
The moment they find out your goals and how much you earn, they get this uncontrollable urge to run away. It looks like the only kind of men who feel comfortable dating ambitious women are those who are equally enthusiastic and aren’t afraid of making their jobs their priority.
But why do the rest majority of the male population still feel uncomfortable dating aspiring women? Why do they rather choose those who earn less than them than those who desire success more than anything in the world?
You’ll find out the answers right now.
1. They feel less masculine when dating a woman who earns more than them
It’s written in men’s DNA that they need to be providers. Their family needs to live on the money they earn and not that which comes from their wife’s pocket.
Even though times have changed, this belief is still rooted in men’s minds. So, the moment they realize that a woman earns more from them, she immediately gets disqualified as an adequate partner.
This usually happens because a man starts to feel less masculine when he realizes that a woman has bigger ambitions than he has. This makes him realize that she won’t stop until she’s happy in a formidable position. In most cases, it means she’ll probably receive a bigger paycheck than the one he gets.
At that point, a man feels like he’s failed at his role. He feels less masculine as he’s not the breadwinner anymore. And since this need to provide for his loved ones is so deeply embedded in him, he instantly starts to feel like he’s not good enough.
Generations of men who came before him taught him that he should be able to be the main provider for his family. So, when a woman earns more than he does, he’s bombarded with thoughts that he can’t accomplish his main goal in life.
To save themselves from ending in this situation, many men avoid dating ambitious women altogether. They stick with those who are family-oriented and don’t feel the need to prove themselves in the business world.
That way, these men feel better about themselves when they prove to others that they’re the ones who bring the food to the table.
2. They know an ambitious woman doesn’t depend on a man
Another reason men still don’t feel comfortable dating ambitious women is that they know that such a woman could leave them at any point in time. She would never depend on him as she knows very well how to take care of herself.
Similar to the need to provide for his family, a man also feels the need to be a hero. He wants to feel like he’s the knight in shining armor to the woman he loves.
But when he starts dating an ambitious woman, he realizes that’s not what he’s going to be. He realizes she doesn’t need his help and protection, which directly affects his self-esteem.
That’s why he’d rather date someone he’ll be a helping hand to than someone who can do everything on her own. By doing so, he’d feel more confident and capable, which are the two main things a man desperately wants.
3. They feel threatened when a woman has bigger goals than they do
Only a strong man can fall in love with a strong woman. That’s a fact and this article is the actual proof of that.
The moment a man realizes a woman has bigger goals than he does, he’s instantly threatened by her. He feels that she’s better than him.
This realization scares him off because it makes him feel like he can’t offer much to the relationship. He’s aware that this woman can provide herself with everything she needs, which makes it harder for him to fulfill his role.
At one point he’ll feel like he’s giving his best yet still can’t compete with her. And honestly, that’s one of the worst things a man can experience.
It’s in men’s nature to assume the roles of hero and protector. So, when they fail at doing so, they feel like they’ve failed as men.
Even though society has developed, unfortunately, most men still don’t feel secure enough to date ambitious women. They don’t think they’re capable of the task and would rather be with someone who’s on their level or even below.
So, if you’re an enthusiastic woman who struggles with finding a partner, you need to know that the blame isn’t on you. You’re not the reason you can’t find someone who won’t leave you the moment they hear about your ambitions.
The issue is that you’re dating weak men who are afraid of everything you’re capable of doing and achieving. They see you as independent and strong, and know they can’t bring much to the table. Not even close to what you can.
That’s why all of them leave, as they’re not willing to admit to themselves that they can’t compete with you. Until you find someone who’s equally enthusiastic as you are, you won’t be able to settle down with the right one.
Even though men keep saying they’re looking for someone like you, the reality is quite the opposite. Your ambitions scare them and that’s why they cowardly run away, thinking that’s the only way to preserving their masculinity.