Breakups

Does My Ex Think About Me?

Does My Ex Think About Me?
Leslie Blair
Written by Leslie Blair

You two have broken up, and now you look at your old pictures together and ask yourself ‘does my ex think about me?’ 

You should know that it isn’t possible for someone to forget a relationship that once mattered to them so unless your ex has amnesia, the answer to ‘does my ex think about me?’ is yes. He will notice something that reminds him of you, or he will hear a song that brings back memories. He certainly did not erase you from his mind, but does that mean he’ll come back?

Your ex probably thinks about you sometimes, so try to notice the signs he misses you after you break up. They will show you whether he just thinks of you or wants to come back but more on that later.

Let’s focus on answering the question of ‘does my ex think about me?’ You wouldn’t be wondering if you didn’t still think about him a lot and you’re not the only one who feels that way.Everyone who has been in a relationship that was important to them and has changed them in some way always remembers it. It’s even harder if you are a nostalgic or sensitive person so I understand how it can bother you to think that he has forgotten all about you.

Is it possible that your ex has moved on so quickly that he has forgotten all about you? The truth is that it depends on the bond that you two shared, but it’s very likely that he still thinks about you sometimes.

Even though it’s perfectly reasonable that you wonder ‘does my ex think about me?’ you should be careful. Holding on to an old lover might not be the healthiest choice in the long run as it could keep you from enjoying your life and moving on.

Still, you’re only human, and it’s normal that you miss someone who you cared about very much in the past. Ending a relationship is never easy but try and avoid overthinking.

The question of ‘does my ex think about me?’ brings with it the fear that he has forgotten about you because you’re not significant to him. It’s scary to think that, but after all, what are you losing? Just a person who has already left.

What would help is to look at things objectively so let’s look at the signs that your ex thinks about you.

Does my ex think about me?

1. Your relationship was mutual

If your relationship was one-sided and you were the one pursuing him and putting in all the effort, he might not think of you. However, if you were in a mutual relationship, you participated in it equally.

Maybe you and your ex had some rough patches that you would like to forget… but there were good times both of you will enjoy remembering. 

The truth is, no relationship is completely bad or completely good so if you think that your relationship was terrible, it’s not true. Relationships have their good times and their bad times. While we’d like to forget about the bad things, it’s always great to remember the good ones.

2. You spent a lot of time together

It’s hard for people who spent a lot of time together to forget about all that. Even if your ex doesn’t want to think of you, he will encounter similar situations that will bring back memories.

For example, maybe he will walk down the street and notice the restaurant where you had your very first date. It will instantly make him think of you, and the same thing could happen to you.

When two people have spent a lot of time together, even little things can bring back the memories of those times. On the other hand, if you didn’t spend much time together, the answer to ‘does my ex think about me?’ might be no and this is because he might not have that much to remember. 

The thing about memory is that we tend to store the recollections that are important to us as soon as they happen. However, just because someone doesn’t remember something you did doesn’t mean that they didn’t care about you… they just gave value to some other memory.

Memories sometimes require a trigger so he might be thinking about you if a friend mentioned you or if he saw an old picture of you when you were happy together.

3. You stayed in touch when you were apart

When you sincerely care about someone, you want to stay in touch with that person even when you are apart. What was your relationship like when you were apart? Did you exchange messages, chat on Facebook, write emails or letters, or make video calls on Skype?

Those interactions turned into shared memories. Maybe he will come across an old email you sent him, and it will make him think of you.

Connecting online in a romantic way has great value in modern times, where it has become a part of having a relationship. Just consider how many dating apps and sites are popular. Internet dating brings people closer together and keeps them connected when they can’t be physically together.

4. You accomplished something together

Did you and your ex work together to achieve some goals? That effort you put into succeeding, and the success itself, became a part of your ex and it stayed an important part of him even once you broke up.

If he is ever to build on that success, he will remember the first steps that you took together. This doesn’t have to be something big; even putting furniture together counts as a success.

If there is something your ex couldn’t have done without you, he will remember it forever. The things that you both worked hard to achieve are now valuable memories that keep the bond between you two alive.

5. You faced a life challenge together

Did you two face a major life crisis and push through it together? That means that you created memories that will last for the rest of your lives.

The interesting thing about a life challenge is that it can bring people together or tear the relationship apart. However you look at it, it’s significant to the people in the relationship. It creates a strong bond between partners that is hard to forget.

Both of you remember what you went through. If you ever reconnect, you can try bringing it up and listen to his memories about it. It could make it clear that the time you two spent together was meaningful and significant to both of you.

Every one of us has the power to change another person’s life for the better. If you two supported each other when you were going through a difficult time, you know how it feels.

6. He contacts you

If your ex contacts you, it’s one of the signs that he thinks about you; check out the signs he misses you after the break-up as well.

The truth is, everyone is sad about breaking up, whether they are the dumper or the dumpee, but they still need some time for themselves.

Has your ex contacted you yet? Whether it’s via text messages or social media, if he is reaching out to you, he’s thinking about you.

7. He stalks your social media

When your ex thinks of you, he might not call you to let you know, but he will want to know what you’ve been up to and this is where the wonders of social media come in.

Has your ex been reacting to your social media posts? Whether he likes your posts or comments on your pictures, it means you’re still on his mind.

Still, he might not react to your social media, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t checking it out. All exes stalk their ex-lovers on social media from time to time because they want to know what’s going on in their lives. That just proves the fact that every ex thinks of his ex-girlfriend sometimes.

8. He asks your mutual friends about you

If your ex still thinks of you, he’ll want to know what you’ve been up to so if he’s not satisfied with the information he can find on your social media, he’ll ask your mutual friends about you.

Don’t be surprised if your mutual friends tell you that he has been asking them about you. Maybe something like, “I miss her,” slipped out, so your friends will tell you all about it.

Still, it’s only natural for him to ask about you since you were an important part of his life. It doesn’t have to mean that he wants to get back together, but it does show he thinks of you.

9. He calls you at weird times

Maybe your ex not only thinks of you but can’t sleep because of it. If he calls you in the middle of the night, it’s a sign.

The weirder the hour he calls, the more he’s thinking about you. These calls are usually attempts to make up, but they are often when the ex is drunk or lonely.

If he calls you in the middle of the night with some lame excuse, you know what it’s really about. He’s thinking about you, and he couldn’t help but call because he wanted to hear your voice.

10. He shows up at the places you frequent

If your ex is thinking about you, he’ll want to see you. Just hearing your voice won’t be enough, or he will be too scared to call you so he will simply start showing up at the places he knows you frequent, in the hope of running into you.

Maybe you see him at a party and think that it’s a coincidence… but then you see him at the place where you do your dry cleaning. Is it really a coincidence? If it happens frequently, it’s not the universe trying to get you back together, it’s him stalking you.

11. He hasn’t returned your things

All of us have things that we left at our ex’s place and usually, sometime after the break-up, exes get together to return each other’s stuff.

If your ex is avoiding doing that and is still holding on to your things, it’s a sign he thinks about you. He might even use your stuff as an excuse to see you, but you’ll know because he won’t return all of it; after all, he wants to use the same excuse again.

What I learned from one of my exes is that they sometimes even test your will to end everything. I know because one ex once brought my things over, and we got back together. When I asked him why he brought my stuff back if he wanted to get back together, he said that he wanted to see if I would take it. He was actually testing my decision to break up, at the same time as having an excuse to see me. Whatever the case is in your situation, be careful.

Your ex became an ex for a reason, and you’re torturing yourself with wondering ‘does my ex think about me?’ Now that you know the truth, do you feel better? Did you get your closure, or do you have an even bigger need to revive the old passion?

What you decide is up to you, but don’t hurry to forgive your ex for everything that happened. Maybe this person wasn’t right for you, but there’s someone who is. You’ll only lose the chance to meet someone new by going back to something from the past merely because it’s familiar.

Still, I can’t deny the possibility that your ex could really love you and be the right person for you. Only you know what you should do. Just don’t obsess too much about the past if the other person hasn’t proved they care about you.

Now that you know if your ex still thinks of you, to get inside his head, be sure to read our other article about exes. We have written about the signs that he will come back, so if that’s the next question on your mind, be sure to read all about it.

 

Does My Ex Think about me?

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