It has happened to many before- things were good, great chemistry, easy conversations then radio silence! You are left wondering why he is ignoring you. Was he even into you? Did you misread the situation? Being ignored isn’t a great feeling. Nobody in the history of mankind has ever loved being ignored especially now when you have evidence he has been reading the dozens of texts you have been sending him. It’s understandable to feel infuriated by this. Responding to a text or even coming out and saying he doesn’t like you would be better than being ghosted. Here is what to do when a man ignores you.
When a Man Ignores You
The bottom line is, being ignored or ghosted is damn confusing. You waste your time figuring out what went wrong and what you have to do to get him back. No matter the reason, you need to know the reason behind that so that you can know whether to give him a chance or cut him loose. Here are some tips on what to do when a man ignore you:
1. Is he playing games?
Some people like playing games in relationships. They believe playing games with a woman will make her want them more. This is why some will stop replying when you have been texting just fine previously. They’ll ignore voicemails and even leave some questions unanswered intentionally. This is to destroy your self-esteem in the hope that you start acting needy and clingy. The feeling of being needed and wanted gives them an ego boost. If your phone calls and texting go unanswered and he doesn’t have a real reason for doing do so then he’s playing games and you need to leave.
What to do if a guy is playing games
If a guy ignores you hoping he’ll win you over by messing with your head then that isn’t someone you should be with. Someone who can’t admit he is into you and takes forever to reply when you are texting will only waste your time in the long run. You shouldn’t be entertaining him in the first place. Instead of letting him ruin your self-esteem you should leave the first time he ignores you. If he loves you he won’t play games. Also, ask yourself what will happen down the line if he is playing games when the relationship is still new.
2. Is he ignoring you because he’s unsure about you?
You may know that you like a guy when you start dating but he may still be unsure about his feelings for you. This happens mostly when you are ready for a committed relationship but he isn’t. There is nothing wrong with being at different stages as far as romantic relationships go- what is not right is him ignoring you instead of telling you the real reason he doesn’t think the relationship will work out.
However, don’t pull the plug the first time he distances himself. Someone who was used to casual relationships may need some time to adjust when he meets a woman who might be the one. That is why some men will pullback in the first place. Spending a few days on his own will help clear his mind so that he can decide whether to pursue a committed relationship with you or not. Give him a chance and see what happens. Give him time to figure out what he wants and reconnect when he’s ready to have that discussion with you.
3. Does he want to slow things down?
A new relationship brings with it euphoric feelings especially if the feelings are strong. This is why you may realize that you are moving fast when it is too late. Nonetheless, even if he loves you he might panic when he comes to his senses and realizes you are moving fast. When you bring up discussions about the future of the relationship when it’s been barely a month since you started seeing each other he might freak out. This might be the reason for the cold shoulder or your text messages and phone calls going unanswered.
He may want to slow down and get to know you before you start picking Tupperware and deciding how many puppies you’ll have. However, not every guy will do this. Some will be upfront with you about whether they want something serious or not. If he gives you the silent treatment instead of being upfront about your concerns then he’s emotionally immature.
If he ignores you owing to the relationship moving too quickly you can give him a week or 2 to decide whether he wants to continue with the relationship or not. You should also slow down and process where this might leave you in the future. Determine whether things with the new guy are great or you are blinded by the honeymoon phase of the relationship. The honeymoon phase feels great because of the hormones and endorphins your brain releases in reaction to having something new with this new guy. Also, you may not have witnessed their dark side or argued. You’ll see nothing wrong with them hence bask in the bliss.
If you spend some time alone you’ll know whether he’s the right guy for you or you are just infatuated. If there are clear signs that there isn’t hope for a long-term relationship in the future you need to have a discussion about that and decide on the way forward. Even if doing the right thing for you may not feel that great the first time, focus on self-love and keep in mind that things will get better.
4. Is he ignoring you because his feelings are hurt?
Men have a fragile ego and it is one of the main reasons a guy ignores you when he feels hurt. Everything might have seemed great until he starts giving you the silent treatment. By going back to the first time that happened you may discover what hurt him. The thing that had caused it all may not have seemed to be a big deal to you but it might have left him quite upset. If the guy is ignoring you then you’re probably right.
If a guy ignores you because he’s upset you can fix that by apologizing. Saying sorry can prevent situations from sprawling out of control. Even if you weren’t at fault you should apologize for the sake of peace. When both of you let ego get in the way of your love life no one wins. It can be in person or through a text message. You’ll simply be letting him know that his feelings matter and it was never your intention to hurt him.
5. When he ignores you because it is over
It might be that a guy is ignoring you because it is over. This is one of the drawbacks of modern dating. People will give you a cold shoulder instead of letting you know it’s over. There is nothing wrong with breaking up with someone instead of prolonging a lie that you’re still into them.
If a guy ignores you instead of coming out and telling you he no longer wants to be with you see it as a blessing in disguise. You don’t want your love life to be destroyed by one guy who is emotionally immature to be upfront about what he feels. Dating karma is real and if you don’t want to suffer from that you need to be upfront the moment you realize you don’t like someone. Also, the sooner you can cut off that one guy who is giving you silent treatment the sooner you can find the one.
When a guy ignores you ignore him back
Relationships are tricky and no matter how many you have been in none will be the same as the other. The bottom line is you need to learn some tricks to help you get the attention of some guys. One of the clear signs that he is losing interest is if he seems distant and if you have never dealt with such a situation before you may feel lost. Whether it’s online dating or it’s just the first month of the relationship you may be afraid of saying anything and pushing him further away. You need to take a deep breath at that point and slow down.
Overreacting to get a guy’s attention is the wrong move especially if it is clear that he’s been ignoring you. You might have read about a girl who begged, threw tantrums and sent 100 texts after being ignored by a guy and laugh until you are in the same situation and doing the same things. However, no matter how difficult it might be to ignore a guy who is also ignoring you, it is the perfect antidote.
This is what to do when a guy ignores you:
1. Ignore your need to overreact
Jumping to conclusions is a weakness many women have. Nothing might even be wrong but if the text doesn’t have a heart emoji or you feel it is different from how he normally texts it might make you feel a type of way. However, ensure there is a real reason for you to worry before you decide to overreact. A lot of time this won’t be the case. When the right guy comes along you don’t want to run him off because of your pettiness. You want him to see you as someone who doesn’t overthink every word he says. Self-love can save you from obsessing about every little thing he does. When you ignore him back he’ll wonder why you are unconcerned and this makes him fall for you even harder.
2. Avoid exaggerated emotional displays
Men and women don’t experience emotions in the same way. That’s why women shouldn’t show exaggerated emotions too soon. Men take time figuring things out and making sure what they feel for you is real. If you come unto him too fast you’ll likely lose him. If he pulls back and you do the same as well, a lot of time he’ll come back because it knocks him off the pedestal he might have put himself on as far your love goes.
3. Put yourself first
You shouldn’t go for every last-minute invitation he gives you or be fast to answer his phone calls. However, it isn’t just a matter of acting busy but rather being busy as well. Lead the kind of life you want and attend to your needs. Spend time with friends and family and dedicate even more time to your studies, work, interests, career plans and even activities without dragging him into that. Any expert in relationship advice will tell you it is a good sign in any relationship. You need to have your own life and not just be going with whatever he needs. Compromising is important but it isn’t a good sign when you are always the one doing it. Men are attracted to independent women who always have their lives together.
4. Don’t ignore your wishes
You shouldn’t be a spectator in your own life no matter who you are taking relationship advice from. Even if you are in online dating, plan road trips, go see movies or even make dinner plans with friends. If you are sure he will like the plans then go ahead and invite him. It isn’t a must for the man to make arrangements. However, don’t cancel just because he said no. Tell him it’s okay he cannot go and get your friends to join. He’ll realize for sure he isn’t the only important thing going on in your life and act accordingly not to lose you.
5. Be hot and cold with him
When you constantly ignore a man he’ll get tired of reaching out. Thus, this isn’t the direction you want to take. Act hot and cold to give him hope. If you have been ice queen for some time you need to show him there is a warm heart beneath the ice. Talk to him from time to time and take an interest in what he’s saying. The key is to give him sudden hints of attention so that the desire to talk to you grows. Create a balance between giving him attention and ignoring him.
6. Spark his jealousy
Men are competitive and when a guy ignores you that can be used against him. Some jealousy will jolt him out of slumber and make him go after you. When a guy ignores you it might be because he thinks he won’t lose you. However, when it becomes apparent you might be snatched away he might be forced to take action. However, be careful because one of the reasons why a man ignores you might be because you seem uninterested. Showing too much interest in others might make him think there is no hope of getting you and he’ll leave you alone for good. Thus, know the reason why a man ignores you because using jealousy to get him back
7. Follow his lead
When a man ignores your texts you should also do the same. Don’t even answer his phone calls. forcing things, insisting or calling will be useless in such a case. When a man ignores your text it isn’t an invitation to send a dozen more. This will make him wonder what you have been up to. When he ignores you and later starts texting take your time before replying. You’ll be like this complicated puzzle he’s eager to solve. When he ignores you but you are too available when he comes back it makes him think he can be treating you hot and cold anytime he wants to and you
8. Talk to someone else
If you are wondering what to do when he ignores you then you may as well as start talking to someone else. It doesn’t even have to be a new romance. Even going out with friends will be helpful and while at it you can vent about what to do when he ignores you. When you talk it through with someone else it will stop being this big problem and take your mind off it. You can also connect with more people looking for ideas on what to do when he ignores you but don’t end up in a trauma bond.
9. Leave your phone
If you are used to having your phone at hand you should try leaving it for a few hours or a day. It is easy to obsess about why he’s not texting when a guy ignores you but likes you. This confusion and frustration can lead you down the rabbit hole. Also, don’t make it too obvious that you are bothered by it. If all your social media posts are about what to do or venting about when a guy ignores you but likes you he’ll know you are subtweeting him or posting about him. It won’t be good for your case.
10. Find a new guy
When a man ignores you ignore him back and get a new guy while at it. However, don’t stumble into a rebound unaware. Nonetheless, this is a fine line to walk especially if you are still interested in the previous guy. Thus, if you don’t think you can pull this and remain grounded don’t do it.
11. Mute his social media activity
When a man ignores you ignore him back to show him you are not too hung up on him. It might have been a tad easier in the past where communication was a little bit harder unless you are together but not in the social media era. All might have been going well until he pops up on your Instagram or Snapchat feed and you fall apart. Blocking him is a tad too dramatic but muting him will ensure his social media activity doesn’t keep on popping up in your feed when you are trying to forget him.
12. Find a way to work through your feelings.
When a man ignores you ignore him back but also find a way to process the feelings elicited by that. It will be frustrating and can easily take you down the crazy girl zone. However, there is a healthy way you can handle the frustration and confusion. You can sing, write, draw, paint, run or do anything else that helps you calm down. Take your time before you react.
13. End it for good if you think it will be the best thing for you
Instead of sending that “hey” text for the 100th time you can write a short message and direct to the point telling him you are no longer interested in him. This tells him you are not ready to settle for less than the attention you know you deserve. The sooner you do so that the sooner you can move on and find someone who will not ignore you without giving you a proper explanation.