Sometimes, you may feel more alone when you are in a relationship than you would if you were single. Although you are very much aware of this feeling, you still stay in this relationship, hoping that things will change in the future because you are so in love that you’ve lost perspective. I know something like this is hard to accept maybe it is about time you admit to yourself that you are in a one sided relationship and that your boyfriend will never feel for you the same way you feel for him.
- He never matches your effort
If you want to have a successful relationship, it has to be a two-way street, with both of the partners equally trying and making it work. But, if you are in a one sided relationship, you are the only one doing all the work. Whatever is in question, you simply feel like your partner never matches your effort, as he doesn’t have any interest for the relationship to work out. He acts completely indifferent towards the direction in which your relationship is going and deep down, you know you two would break everything off, the moment you stop trying.
- You initiate most of the communication
One of the signs you are in a one sided relationship is that you are the one initiating the communication. You are the only one calling him on the phone and talking to him, trying for you to have meaningful conversations because you know healthy communication is a basis of every healthy relationship. This guy never listens to anything you have to say and he never remembers things that are important for you. You two have been together for a long time, but somehow you still feel like he doesn’t know the true you because he never put an effort to get to know the real you. Even when he gets involved in some kind of communication, you feel like he’s been forced to do so.
- You make most of the plans
The same way you initiate most of the communication, you initiate dates and get-togethers as well. Even when he does ask you out, he is never imaginative and creative. Even if he suggests an activity or a date, it is up to you to plan it, because it is something that bothers him. You feel like you two would never see each other if it weren’t for you chasing him and besides being an indicator of a one sided relationship, it also affects your self-esteem. Although he may feel like he is in a comfort zone when he’s with you and that is why he feels like he doesn’t need to try anymore, this can also be a sign he doesn’t care enough.
- He takes you for granted
If your boyfriend is always expecting for you to be available and expects you to be always there for him, while he never acts the same, it is one of the signs he is taking you for granted and that you are in a one sided relationship. This guy doesn’t feel the need to put any effort in your relationship because he thinks there is nothing he could say or do to you that would make you leave him. Deep down, you know he is not afraid he’ll lose you because he thinks it is implied you’ll always stay by his side, no matter what.
- You keep making excuses for him
If you are in a relationship in which you always feel like you have to make excuses for your partner’s behaviour, it is a warning sign that something is wrong with your relationship. You can lie to yourself, but when your family and friends tell you that he is not behaving like he should, you feel embarrassed and feel the need to justify him in front of others. But, what you need to remember is that these are the people who want only what is best for you and if you feel the need to defend your partner and his behaviour in front of them, it only means that you are very well aware that he is not considerate and respectful to you even in front of other people.
- You don’t feel like a part of his life
When you are in a long lasting, committed relationship, you and your partner should feel like you are parts of each other’s life. But, if you feel like your boyfriend never includes you completely in his life, it means that he doesn’t have the same opinion of your relationship as you do. When you think about your relationship, you find yourself talking to him about your concerns and issues because you feel the need to share these things with him and you want him to be involved in your life. But, he never acts the same and it only means that he doesn’t consider you to be his life partner.
- He doesn’t include you in his future plans
The same way your boyfriend doesn’t include you in his present life, he doesn’t include you in his future, as well. It is like his vocabulary doesn’t have a word “we” in it. He makes short and long term plans, without even mentioning you in them or without even consulting you, which makes you feel you don’t exist as a factor in his life. The two of you don’t have any common end goals, which people in a committed relationship who plan a future together should definitely have.
- You feel like you can’t rely on him
If you are in a healthy relationship, your partner should be your number one support and every problem one of you has should be your common problem. But, you feel like your boyfriend never has your back and you know you can’t rely on him when you are going through some hard times. He is around only when everything is going great, but as soon as times get tough, this guy is nowhere to be found. But, whenever he is going through some difficult times, you are the first person he calls, expecting you to always be there for him.
- You are not his priority
When you are in a serious relationship, you should be your partner’s first priority, or at least on the top of his list. But, on the other hand, if you are in a one sided relationship, your boyfriend considers everything else to be more important than you. For this guy, you are just one of his options. He’ll cancel the plans he has with you to hang out with someone else, but he will never bail on anyone else in his life if you need him.
- You know things shouldn’t be like this
You try to lie to yourself, telling that he is just this type of a man, but deep down, your gut is telling you that this is not how a loving and caring relationship should look like. Your intuition is telling you that this man is not treating you the way you deserve and you know you are in a one sided relationship, no matter how hard you try to run away from that notion.