You Aren’t Supposed To Be Perfect, Just Be Yourself

be perfect
Written by Lejla

Why does everyone strike to be perfect? Perhaps it is because we all want to be loved. It’s pure logic. If you are perfect you have no flaws, therefore the chances that someone will reject you are way closer to zero than having a few flaws. Well, I want to tell you that that logic is so flawed that it should be a crime.

Perfection does not exist. Sure, you can improve your physical appearance and inner self so that most people will like you, but there will always be that one person that dislikes you in some way. No matter how nice you are, how kind or confident or even how hot you are. True perfection does not exist simply because perfection does not mean the same thing to every person. Some people like blondes, some like redheads and some like brunettes. And that is okay because all the beforementioned are beautiful. Of course, this is a basic example, but you can’t be a redhead, a blonde and a brunette all in one, can you?


Even if I may come off as very confident and sure in this, I had my share of self-doubt. I used to try so hard to be perfect that I lost myself. In all that struggle and fake emotions, I forgot who I once was. Every flaw I saw in myself had to be erased. And it was not just physical appearance, it was my emotions, my thoughts and even how I was acting. I did not re-invented myself,  I erased myself. Tried so hard to get rid of every single of my quirks. My imperfections. Never realizing, that those were not imperfections. That all of that was me.

Remembering it now, I am quite embarrassed to say it was all because of a boy. It happened in 8th grade. I was an awkward little thing. With long red curly hair and braces. Yes, don’t forget the big glasses too. Of course, it was just my luck to have a crush on the most popular boy in our school. I had tried everything to be the perfect girl for him. From coloring my hair blonde to being careful of my loud laugh, we don’t want to appear obnoxious with our loud laugh now, do we? It took me a while to realize that I was not happy. It took me some more time to realize that I was over my silly crush.

A better version of yourself

Improving yourself, getting rid of bad habits are not the same as aiming for perfection. When you improve yourself, both mentally and physically, you are still being you. However, when you give yourself into an endless fight for perfection, there is a big chance a person that survives that fight will not be you. Your loud voice is not obnoxious, it is endearing. Your frizzy curly hair is not less attractive than smooth blonde hair. If you are trying to be perfect for someone else, stop. Because if you need to be perfect in order for someone to love you, then there is clearly something wrong with the love that he will give you. The right person will love all of you. Will accept all of you. And anyone that fails to do that, is simply not right for you.

No matter which side you take, you will always go against someone. Now, that we established that, why would you waste your time on trying to be perfect?  Find yourself. With all your flaws and everything that makes you-you. Celebrate yourself. Take a moment and just breathe. Ask yourself who you truly are. After you answered that question, ask yourself who you want to be. But don’t say you want to be the perfected version of you.Figure out what is the best version of you, with all of your flaws and quirks. Then you can start your journey towards improving and accepting yourself. Make amends with your imperfections, there are simply there. And if you erase them, you will lose a big part of yourself. Accept them, because to someone, those imperfections are not imperfections at all.


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