Before anything else, I want you to know that I don’t need a man. Don’t get this wrong- it is not that I don’t want you in my life.
But, I don’t need you in a way that I couldn’t properly function without you. I am doing just fine on my own. I am a complete, independent individual with or without you. I am someone who relies on herself only and my world won’t be torn apart if the two of us split.
And I don’t want you to be scared off once you realize that.
And I don’t want you to think I don’t care if you are around. That is not true- I love you deeply and I am very happy to have you in my life, and since you’ve become a part of it, you’ve empowered my world in multiple ways.
But, if it happens that you stop loving me or that you decide you don’t want to be with me at some point- I will survive. If it happens that you are not the man I need- I will also survive.
I just want you to know that I will never settle for less, no matter how much you mean to me. I want you to know that no mind games could ever win me over. I want you to know that I am not someone who will ever be a subject of your manipulation. I’ve been through that before and I am not ready to go back to that. I don’t want you to think that I don’t love you enough or that I’ve loved this person before more. I love you very much, but I will always love myself more. And I will never settle for you not loving me less than enough.
I think we can be happy and I hope that will happen. But, the moment I feel you are losing interest or not appreciating me and my worth, I will be gone, no matter how much it hurts me.
I don’t say it would be easy for me to leave you. In contrary, it would be devastating. But, it would be even more painful for me to stay in a relationship which doesn’t fulfill me. Yes, walking away from you would leave emotional scars on my soul. But, staying with someone who loves me only partially and who doesn’t treat me the way I deserve to be treated would leave even deeper and bigger wounds and scars. And that is the last thing I need and want for myself.
Trust me- if you do this and if I am forced to leave, I will not look back. This may sound cruel and it is probably something you don’t want to hear, but I know there are plenty of men out there who would love me and respect me completely.
I want to be with someone who is not afraid of commitment. I don’t need a boy in my life- I need a real man. A man who doesn’t need to be reminded of every little thing or of the fact that he has a girlfriend waiting for him. Actually, I don’t want to be the one sitting at home, waiting for you to come to your senses, waiting for you to change and waiting for you to love me. I want the two of us to live our lives together, as a couple, as a team and as an item. I want a mature man, who can be my life partner. I want someone who will go through life with me shoulder by shoulder.
When I say that I want us to be equals, this means that I don’t want to be inferior or superior to you. I will never allow you to diminish me in any way and the moment you try to that- I will notice and I will walk away. Also, I don’t want to be your mother. Yes, we should take care of each other, but I don’t want an immature boy who can’t make up his mind. I want someone who is ready to take responsibilities for his words and actions and someone who doesn’t need my approval to make the simplest life decisions.
I don’t want you to feel threatened by my strength. Instead, I want us to be proud of each other. I want you to look at my every success as if it were your own and vice versa. I don’t need a man who will try to belittle me, so he could feel better about himself.
And most of all, I don’t need a man who can’t accept me for who I truly am. If you ever try to change me, know right away that you won’t succeed. I worked hard to become a woman I am today and I won’t allow anyone not to respect that, no matter how important that someone is for me.
I am not self-centered nor am I selfish. I am not narcissistic, and I don’t want you to think that. I am just a woman who is well aware of her worth. And a lot of people in my life tried to put me down and tried to diminish my worth. Some of them succeeded for a while. And I never want to allow myself to go back to that period. Now, when I finally have my entire life figured out, I am not letting anyone not worth it in.
But, I still believe in love. And I still believe in happily ever after. All of my disappointments didn’t change the essence of my being and didn’t make me a cold-hearted person, although I may appear to be like that sometimes. I still believe that there exists a man meant to be with me.
And I really hope this man to be you.
But, if you are not, please leave me on time. Don’t waste your or my time. If you are not this man, trust me- I won’t stay around waiting for you to become him. I am not going to wait until you change and allow myself to get hurt in the process.
I don’t think I am asking for too much and I don’t think I am complicated. I am just asking you not to play games and to try and match my effort. When you come to think about it, I am easy to please.
Essentially, all I want is love. And if you love me hard enough, you’ll respect me, you’ll believe in me, you’ll appreciate me and you’ll never have the desire to change me. Everything else is bullshit.
You may think you all of this is too much for you to handle. You may think I am too difficult and too challenging to handle. Maybe the two of us are not on the same page- maybe you are not ready for the level of commitment I am looking for. There is nothing wrong with that. And I don’t blame you for that nor will I judge you if you are sincere with yourself and with me. If this is the case, just be the man enough to walk away from this instance.
The only thing that I would resent you is if you know you can’t love me the way I hope you can, but you choose to stay by my side just because I am convenient or until someone more suitable comes along.
But, if you think you have what I am looking for, know that it will be worth it. You may think I am asking for a lot, but trust me- I will give you even more.