Friendship Love Relationships

Here’s Why You Shouldn’t Be Friends with Your Ex

be friends with your ex
Written by Naida

The worst part of dating someone is your break up. No matter which of you has to make the first step and leave, still it is not comfortable at all. Sometimes you are even forced to ask a formal question to know if you are going to stay friends. Even though it is possible, those friendship are very rare, because you were intimate with one another. I mean, how can you act like completely honest friends, without attracting each other like before? As I said, it is possible but honestly not likely to happen. There are many reasons why people stay friends with their exes and why you shouldn’t be friends with your ex, and these are some of them.

THEY WANT TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU

Something was not working well between you and your partner, so you ended it. Still, your partner or perhaps you are trying to get in touch. If either of you tends to sustain the friendship, maybe it is because you need or want something from each other. If you didn’t fit for each other, maybe you still have something that attracts your partner or vice versa. Maybe your intimacy was mind blowing. Maybe one of you wants money or something that shows that you or your partner wants to use you.

THEY MAYBE WANT TO DISTRACT OR RUIN YOUR NEW RELATIONSHIPS

After a breakup, you find it fine to stay friends with your ex. It is good because you have no one else. But when you are about to meet someone new in your life, your ex who is now your friend, would probably be the problem. I don’t say that it is not normal to have your ex in your life. If he is constantly somewhere around, it stops the other guy who wants to get closer to you. So your relationships are probably endangered.

THEY NEED TO BE IN CHARGE OF YOU

Once when you experience that you can take the control over someone, you become like addicted so it is hard to pull yourself back. Usually narcissists are those who want to take control after you end your relationship, and it is because they feel kind of guilty for your breakup. They feel like they couldn’t control those last days of your relationship. In order to feel better, they will tend to be in charge of you, long after you end your relationship.

THEY WANT TO TAKE BENEFIT OF YOU

Your ex will probably try to use your niceness if you maintain a friendship after your relationship ends. He or she will text you when they are bored, they will meet you only when they want to, and those places you visit are closer to them than to you, because they are not in the mood to spend all day with you. On the other side, a real friend would come wherever you wanted him or her to. Maybe your ex has in mind to ask you for some money or they are keeping you close in order to have occasional sex. The reasons are multiple and you need to be careful if you decide to keep your ex close to you after a breakup.

THEY WANT VENGEANCE

There is some sort of connection between sociopath and narcissist and you need to know how to spot them. Both of these two breeds tend to seek revenge. Even though they look like they would never try to hurt you, which is easier now that you are not in a relationship, probably they are acting. Don’t fall down because they are friendly—try to be careful. They can try to interfere in your new relationship in order to ruin it. They can also try to hurt you in many different ways, so the point is to stay watchful.

I assure you that you can live normally without being friends with your ex. As I said, there is a possibility to stay friends, but more often it is not likely. It’s much better if you can move on and not look back to the past. Maybe it will be hard at first, but you will get over it and breathe freely.

 

About the author

Naida

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