Emotional Needs in a Relationship

Written by Hayley Anderton

Everyone has emotional needs in a relationship, whether they’re willing to admit it or not. It can be hard to express them out loud, especially when the other person seems happy and content. However, many people feel they’re not getting what they need from their relationship, and if they’d only communicate with their partner, it would be an issue easily solved. But what are these mysterious emotional needs in a relationship that are being neglected? Well it depends on the person’s gender.

Emotional needs in a relationship: Women

To be listened to

One of the top things women feel like they lack is a man that will listen to them. So many male partners seem as though they don’t pay attention, simply nodding along in an important conversation. Often afterwards, men don’t remember the conversation their girlfriend tried to engage them in. It’s important to women to feel like their opinions are valued, and that what they say matters to someone else. They want to feel like their partner will talk them through their problems, celebrate their achievements, and laugh along with their jokes.

To be sexually desired

Women don’t necessarily want to feel sexy all the time. They don’t want to be constantly checked out by guys at bars, or sexualised at work. What they want is for their partner to make them feel sexy. They want to feel like the only woman in their man’s life, and they want to feel like they’re appreciated. They love to be complimented by their man, and praised in the bedroom in every single way. If they feel sexually attractive, they feel valued.

To feel safe

Women crave the feeling of being safe with their partner. They don’t want to feel on edge the whole time. Once the scary first part of a relationship is passed, they want to settle and not have to make any major changes. They want to feel like their partner can keep them safe from any scenario, emotionally and physically.

Emotional needs in a relationship: Men

To be physically touched

A woman’s touch is vital to a man. Men love to have physical contact with their partner, whether it’s sexual or just holding hands and cuddling. They feel valued when their partner gives them physical attention without being asked. Men appreciate the things they can see in front of them, whereas a woman may look deeper inside for validation. A simple touch can be enough to satisfy a man’s emotional needs as well as his physical ones.

To be given space

Men don’t like to be held back from keeping to their routine. They won’t necessarily be willing to give up all of their life for their girl the way their partner would for them. For example, if they go out with their friends regularly, they will want to continue the tradition. They also use this as time apart from their relationship, so they may not understand why their girl might want to tag along. They need space to breathe or they feel trapped and unable to live their life the way they’re used to.

To be appreciated and praised

A man’s ego can be fragile, which is why they love when a woman feeds it. They like to be praised for their achievements, and told they have worth in whatever form it comes in. They love to be told that they’re good people, or good at their favourite hobby, or that they achieve highly at work. Any girl they date must be complimentary of him to fulfil his emotional needs in a relationship.

About the author

Hayley Anderton