We all like to perceive the New Year as a chance for a new beginning. We all like to focus on the things we’ll do differently, but sadly, we rarely stick to those decisions. Here, you have a list not of the things you should do, but of behaviors you should make an effort to get rid of in the upcoming year. Give yourself a clean start and get rid of negative and toxic things and people in your life.
Approval of others
Many people ask for confirmation and approval of others as a sign that they are making the right decisions and that their life is on the right track. If you are one of these people, this is the first thing you need to get rid of. You don’t have to fit in today’s society and change your behavior norms or beliefs just to fit in with people. Those who love you will love you for who you are, and you don’t need the others. Instead, what you need to do is accept the fact that not everyone is going to like you. And you shouldn’t be offended by this fact—after all, it’s their choice and right. No matter how much you try it, you’ll never be able to please everyone. So, why do you even bother? You are a grown up and you are more than capable of making your own decisions. Besides, you are the only one dealing the consequences of those decisions. You don’t depend on anyone, so why would you allow people to dictate your life choices?
Jealousy and envy are two of the worst emotions anyone could feel. There is no reason to be jealous of anyone, because you never know what some person is actually going through, despite the fact that his or her life may appear perfect on the surface. Although you probably think that people don’t notice your jealousy, trust me, it’s very much transparent. By being jealous, you are only showing to others that you are not satisfied with your life. And instead of focusing your time and energy in improving yourself, you waste it on envying others who are maybe more successful than you are. You won’t become better than them just by being jealous. On the contrary, you’ll get bitter and full of negative energy. Your envy won’t harm the people you are jealous of—the only person you’ll harm is yourself.
Criticism can only bring unnecessary negativity in your life. Of course, you should always tell someone when their behavior is bothering you, but don’t be the negative person of every crowd—the one who is impossible to please and satisfy. People tend to run away from this kind of negativity. Try to look for the positive side in everything. And most importantly, stop being so hard on yourself. Self-criticism is one of the worst things you can put yourself through. Allow yourself to make mistakes and accept that you are not perfect. You are only a human being and are entitled to errors. Look at the mistakes you are making as experiences that will make you wiser and smarter the next time you find yourself in a similar situation. Don’t put unrealistic expectations in front of others and in front of yourself. Always go for improvement, but take baby steps and don’t think of every little step behind as a great failure.
Toxic people and relationships
Sometimes, toxic people and unhealthy relationships can cost us more than we think. It’s impossible for you to be optimistic if there is someone constantly putting you down and bringing negativity in your life. It’s always hard to cut off toxic people, because unfortunately, those are mostly the people who are closest to us—otherwise, they wouldn’t have such a huge impact on us. But that is something it needs to be done. No matter how challenging it may seem, you need to remove yourself from people who don’t have a good impact on you, and you need to do it for your own good. Get rid of everyone who doesn’t deserve a place in your life—rid of those who are not there for you when you need them, of those who come and go from your life as they please, those who are bad for your mental health, those who use you, those who try to manipulate you… You’ll see that you’ll start feeling way better before you know it.
We all have insecurities and you should never think you are the only one with self-esteem problems. But, you are the only one who can fight your insecurities and shouldn’t expect anyone else to do it for you. First of all, embrace and accept your imperfections and flaws. Learn to love yourself for who you are. If you have insecurities about your physical appearance, be aware that nobody looks perfect and that there doesn’t exist a person who wouldn’t like to change something about their body. But, instead on focusing on those things you don’t like about yourself, focus on the things that are great about you. Start thinking about those physical imperfections as of things that make you special and unique. If your insecurities are connected with your personality traits, work on those things. Remember, you can be whoever you want to be, all you need is a little faith in yourself. Once you start respecting yourself and believing in yourself more, others will notice that and will follow.
The desire to control everything
Although there are things in your life you can take in your hands, you also must accept the fact that there are some situations you can’t control. Sometimes, you need to let yourself loose and give yourself a break. Taking responsibility for your actions is always a mature thing to do, but you need to realize there are some things above your control. You simply can’t fix everything and everyone, no matter how hard you try. The only thing you can control is you attitude towards the things that are happening to you or around you, and you should focus on having a positive attitude towards life. Trying to control everything will only cause you to be constantly anxious and will intensify your insecurities. I’m not saying you shouldn’t take an active role in your life—I’m only advising you to go with the flow and relax from time to time. You only have one life and you don’t want to spend it worrying all the time. Some things will have the same outcome whether you worry and think about them all the time or if you simply relax and see where life takes you.
Changing your lifestyle is one of the most common New Year resolutions. Every year, we decide we’ll take better care about our body and health. We promise ourselves that we’ll change our diet, that we’ll start exercising and that we’ll dedicate more time and energy to our physical and mental health. But, sadly, in most cases, those are only promises we rarely fulfill. Now it’s the time to actually do those things. Don’t concentrate on your health just so you can look better—focus on it because there is nothing more important than that. Your body is your temple and it’s about time you start cherishing it. Don’t allow yourself to regret later on because you didn’t do anything beneficial for yourself, because it may be too late.