Life Love Relationships

Stop Wasting My Time If You’re Not Serious About Me

not serious about me
Written by Karen Clark

Serious relationships have become rare in today’s world. I don’t know if modern society has imposed this type of behavior on us, if nobody is interested who they are dating anymore, as long as they are dating someone or are people in general too afraid of getting hurt, but everywhere you look, you’ll see almost relationships—relationships without labels and people who are not committed or exclusive. But what I know is that isn’t for me.

Call me old fashioned or too serious for my age, but I am not ready to adapt to something just because it is typical for the age I live in. I have my principles and I’m not ready to give up on them just to please someone or to fit into the masses.

I am someone who gets emotionally attached easily and I can’t afford being someone who is not willing to give himself completely to me and to our relationship. I know I will just suffer eventually and I am not crazy to expose myself to something like that just to fit some ridiculous standards modern dating has made normal.

Besides, I simply don’t have the time, the energy, or the will to fool around with someone. I don’t know when it became acceptable for people to date different people at the same time and not call it cheating, because they are not exclusive with any of them. I must have missed out on something, but for me, sex has always been something serious and something you share with a special person and it will remain that way, no matter how others behave. At what point has it become acceptable and almost mandatory to demand sex and to sleep with someone on the first or on the second date? Don’t get me wrong, I’m not judging anyone. Everybody should act according to their feelings and I know there are people who feel relaxed and comfortable enough around someone in the beginning so they can be intimate with them. And I respect that. The only thing I don’t want is that someone looks at me strangely because I have different principles.

Most of the guys I’ve met in the last couple of years didn’t want anything serious with me. Actually, most of them wanted casual sex and nothing more. At first, I thought I was the problem and that guys probably think I have nothing besides sex to offer, but then I saw that something similar was happening to all the girls around me.

At first, I tried giving these men a chance, thinking they would eventually see my true value and come to their senses, and I was very clear about my expectations of each so called relationship. But I’ve realized that none of them even thought about at least matching my effort. Most of them just wanted to have a good time and to spend it with someone who is fun to be around. Nobody doesn’t have the energy nor the patience to get to know someone anymore. Nobody tries anymore.

And I’ve came to the conclusion that I was just wasting my time all along. I am someone who is not capable of doing anything with half of my being—I am all or nothing kind of gal, and I just can’t reprogram myself into being someone else, even if I wanted to. I don’t do anything half-heartedly, and if I’m with someone, that person can count on my entire being and on my unconditional love. I don’t have the patience nor the desire to play mind games with guys. If I have feelings for someone, I’m not afraid to express them. If I see that someone is worth fighting for, I will do whatever it takes for that person.

Maybe I am not modern and typical for today’s standards, and you can call me a hopeless romantic, but I still believe in love. I believe in two people being fully committed to each other. I believe in being there for one another, no matter the cost. And if I see my chance for love, I don’t plan on missing it. Everything else is just a waste of time.

If I see that I have to beg for your attention and crave for your affection, I will walk away without a second thought. I appreciate myself and I am fully aware of the things I deserve and I won’t settle for anything less. I have never been nor will I ever be interested in almost relationships, friends with benefits types of relationships, one night stands or casual flings. I know I have a lot to offer and I expect the other person to also be committed and to at least try to make the relationship work. I want something real and I will remain single until I manage to find it.

Although I enjoy sex and perceive it as something natural and important, I am no one’s ticket to free sex. For me, intimacy is much more than simple physical pleasure. I want someone who I will be comfortable and safe with. I want someone who will support me and be my partner in life in every sense of that word. I want someone who will consider me worth fighting for and someone who will have my back in all times. I want someone who will not have a problem with expressing his emotions and someone who will not use mind games with me. I don’t need a man who will keep me around just to boost his ego or until someone more suitable comes along.

I know many people see casual relationships as a fun way to spend your time, but for me, it’s nothing else but a waste of time and energy. I am a person who tries to improve and push myself forward in every situation and I need someone to go shoulder to shoulder with me on that journey and not someone who will distract me.

Whether you like to admit it or not, meaningless flings don’t provide any type of emotional satisfaction. They don’t lead anywhere, so there is no point in investing yourself emotionally or mentally in them. Maybe I can be considered too picky, but I know what I want and I’m not planning on lowering my standards for anyone.

So, if you’re not serious about me or if you don’t want anything serious, please be kind enough not to waste my time. I need someone serious and mature and someone who knows what he wants from life. If you think I am the person you want, you should know that I am a complete individual and if you want my body, it doesn’t come alone—it comes together with my personality traits and my emotions. If you like me when I am happy and joyful, you’ll have to put up with me when I’m moody, depressed, or anxious. You can’t just pick which sides of me you like. If you are not ready to get to know the real me and accepting me for who I truly am, you are not only wasting my time—you are wasting yours as well, because trust me, you won’t accomplish anything with me. You are getting all or nothing. If you want me in any way, you’ll have to be able to handle the entire package.

Stop Wasting My Time If You’re Not Serious About Me