Heartbreak Relationships

Breaking Up With Someone You Love

breaking up
Written by Peggysue

You need to be sure you really want to break up and end the relationship permanently.

If you are not sure that you really want to end the relationship, just don’t. And if you are not okay with the possibility that you may never get back together, don’t choose breaking up. If you break up and you change your mind after, that can make damage to your relationship.

You need to know that person you break up with might be too hurt to stay just your friend.

There is big possibility that the other side will be too hurt if you end the relationship. So you may expect that you two won’t be friends right after the breakup.

Think about real reasons for the breakup, and avoid the wrong reasons.

You need to think whether your relationship is worth ending. Don’t be selfish, think about your partner too.  Avoid wrong reasons for breaking up. If you are not in love anymore, maybe you should break up, or if you are just afraid of being single. Don’t ask or suggest a “break.” When you are ready to break up, then break up, there is no need for a break.

You should make the necessary arrangements.

If you and your partner live together, then you should decide who is going to move out and who is going to stay. Find a way to make breaking up much easier, talk with your partner and together make the necessary arrangements.

 

When you are sure that you really want to break up, then maybe you should follow these ways.

Right time to break up.

A perfect time doesn’t exist for a breakup. But there are many situations that you should avoid. If your partner is dealing with some big problems, or your partner is in the middle of a crisis, you should wait with the breakup. And definitely you should not break up in the middle of a fight. Also don’t break up over text, or the telephone, choose  a face-to-face breakup instead.

Don’t surprise your partner with the breakup.

You should prepare your partner for the conversation. Don’t surprise your partner while he or she is busy doing something or in the middle of a conversation. You should tell your partner that you need to talk with them about something serious, so they can be emotionally prepared.

Don’t blame your partner for everything.

Actually, you should use “I” statements. You don’t want to be rude or to hurt your partner even more. Try something like this. Don’t say, “You want to spend all day with me,” but instead try this, “I think I need more time for myself.” In this way you will not blame your partner for everything.

Be honest with your partner, but not unnecessarily rude or harsh.

Your partner deserves the truth, so you definitely should be honest. You don’t want to hurt your partner even more. Find a nice way to say all you want to say. Don’t destroy their self-esteem, be nice. You might say that they are really great, that they are smart, and that they have a lot of ambitions. But you think that your ambitions are different.

If you want to stay friends with your partner then you should suggest staying friends.

But if you are not really sure, then don’t suggest staying friends. Being friends maybe will hurt them even more. And whatever your partner decides, respect it. If you stay friends after breaking up, you should not call them or text them on a regular basis. And definitely you should not send them mixed signals.

 

After every breakup there is moving on, this is maybe the hardest part of a breakup. So here are some tips for moving on easier.

Cut down contact with your ex, at least initially.

Staying in touch with your ex after a breakup will actually make things more painful. So try to cut down every contact with your ex. It will help you to move on.

Don’t feel guilty for feeling bad.

Even if you breakup with your partner, you may still feel hurt. Feeling hurt is normal feeling after a breakup, actually it will help you to heal.

Find time for yourself.

You may feel a loss after a breakup. So maybe you should do some things for yourself to feel better. Try to be single instead of jumping into a new relationship. Take some time just for yourself, find a new hobby, actually do whatever makes you happy.

About the author

Peggysue

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