You’ve heard numerous pieces of advice telling you how your perfect man should behave, how he should look and treat you. And everybody is telling you to stay single until you find a man who treats you like a princess and who will love you no matter what. Of course, these are all qualities you should look for in a boyfriend. But society gives us so many norms, rules, and boundaries. Sometimes we feel exhausted and burdened. You probably caught yourself searching for a man by the book, a man who is perfect on paper and has all the qualities Mr. Right should have. But have you put your feelings aside during this search?
You have probably dated some wrong guys. You have also been in toxic relationships that left you feeling miserable and drained. So, you have decided to give up on dating and relationships. You’ve decided to stay single and wait for the perfect guy to come along. It’s perfectly reasonable for you to that because modern dating can be exhausting and tiring. You wait for Mr. Right and think that letting anyone else get close to you is a simple waste of time and energy.
You think if you give a chance to anyone who doesn’t fit your criteria, you are settling for less. You decided to stay single until that happens, but did you ever think that you are just limiting yourself? There are numerous opportunities and chances you are missing out on because you’ve decided to wait for someone that may never come and probably doesn’t even exist. You tell yourself to be patient, to wait, and to never settle for anything or anyone less than you deserve. You keep telling yourself to continue searching until you find the right person. Of course, you should appreciate yourself and always put yourself first, but have you ever thought of all the guys you missed out on while you were waiting for someone perfect?
You are probably scared of being hurt once again. You think what will happen if you fail and fall? But have you ever thought about what could happen if you succeeded? How can you know you’ve found true love if you haven’t had some wrong ones? How will you know what makes you happy and what you want from a man and from a relationship? You may have missed out on many guys that were good for you but didn’t have the qualities you searched for in a man. If you continue doing so, it’s possible for you to miss your Mr. Perfect because you won’t be able to recognize him. People have layers and you can’t expect to know someone’s true nature until you give him a chance and get to know him better.
You could maybe miss out on someone who is actually perfect for you, but who is not perfect on paper. The first thing you need to realize is that perfect people don’t exist. Nothing in life is perfect. Love and relationships are not perfect and you can’t expect them to ever be. You yourself are far from perfection. You probably have numerous flaws and personality traits that are deal-breakers for some people. But those flaws and imperfections made you the person you are today. Everything you have been through in life and every person that walked through your life shaped you. The same is with everyone else, including your potential boyfriends. You can’t expect someone to fit all of your standards and possess all the qualities you imagined your perfect boyfriend should have.
Instead, you shouldn’t wait for someone who always does and says what is right. You should wait for someone who makes you feel loved and appreciated. You should search for a person who is ready to improve and grow together. And you should search for someone who thinks you are worth fighting for.
Stop holding yourself back. Be brave. Don’t let past experiences limit you. Don’t allow yourself to follow strict guidelines and limitations. And don’t over think and question everything and everyone. You can’t change the future, so why spend your time and energy analyzing something you can’t affect? Just let it be and the perfect one will come. In the meantime, don’t be so hard on yourself—allow yourself to make mistakes.