You just met a guy you really like, but there are some things and habits that he has that you would like to change. You may also be with someone for a long time, but that person has some characteristics that you simply can’t stand. Of course, you should love your partner for the way he is, but sometimes that view is not realistic. It’s perfectly normal there are things about your partner that bother you. Your first impulse is to change these things about him or her, but there are some things you should never try to change. Even if you try, you wouldn’t succeed. Here are things you’ll never change about your partner.
His temper and character
If your boyfriend is hot tempered, no matter how much you try to calm his character, you’ll never succeed. If he is a calmer type or maybe an introvert, you’ll never manage to turn him into someone who likes to party and enjoys meeting new people. So, don’t try to do this. You should try to find a compromise and be involved in activities that suit you both. Admit to yourself that you can’t change his personality. The older someone gets, it’s harder to change his personality. Of course, there are some habits that can be changed, but don’t expect anyone to change his basic personality traits because of you, no matter how important you are to this person.
If your partner has any kind of addiction, he will choose it over you. No matter how much he loves you, he will always love his addiction more. Many people managed to fight and defeat their addictions, but only if they wanted to. Nobody changes anything for another person. If you see that your partner is dealing with some kind of addiction and he doesn’t want to do anything about it and refuses any form of help, the best thing you can do is to move on. You won’t be able to help him, because he needs professional help. If you stay with him, he won’t change and you can be dragged into the same hell with him.
This one is especially important. It’s not just that you can’t change someone’s religious beliefs, you shouldn’t want to. Your religion and your spiritual views are important to you and you expect everyone around you, including your partner, to respect it. You should treat him in the same manner. Someone has been an atheist or has had some religious beliefs since childhood, and you can’t expect them to change it because of you. It’s simply a part of who you are, and like it or not, you must respect it. You shouldn’t impose your religious beliefs on anyone, the same way you wouldn’t like someone to impose theirs on you.
If your religion forbids you to be with someone from another religion and you choose to respect that, you shouldn’t start anything with that person. In this way, you will spare yourself and your partner from unnecessary pain.
His friends and family
You can be jealous of your partner’s relationship with his friends and family, but no matter how much you try, you will never be able to change it. These are the people who were in his life before you and will be there for him if you and he part ways. It’s okay for him to criticize his friends and family, but you shouldn’t do it. It’s also okay if you don’t want to have an overly friendly relationship with them, but you should always respect them. If you disrespect his closest people, you are automatically disrespecting your partner as well. You should never even think of insulting his family or friends, because they are a part of who he is, and you wouldn’t like him disrespecting your loved ones, would you?
The only thing you can achieve if you try to change his friends and family or his relationship with them, is that he starts perceiving you as overly possessive and jealous. This is especially important if your partner has children. You knew about his children when you first met him and you accepted this. You can’t, by any chance, expect him to disregard them because of you.