You Don’t Want To Leave, But That’s The Only Option You Have

Have you ever feel like you don’t really want to leave, but that is the only option you have? You gave a person all of your emotions and commitment, and in return you have nothing. There is not even a strong reason to stay in a relationship. Even though you are not the one who wants to end this connection, you feel like the change is necessary. There is no vain devotion because you don’t want to waste the time on someone who doesn’t deserve you.

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    You are the one who can give a piece by piece of your heart without having anything in return. There is neither mutual trust nor emotions. Your person is not capable to stay by your side, even though you showed him that you want him more than anyone. You stopped trusting that there is any of love left, so you asked yourself—is it worth to stay? The person you are with is not aware that you don’t believe in changes and love anymore. Only thing you can do, even if you do not want to, is to turn away and go. That is the only option you have.

    Still, there is something sad in leaving. You know that if you leave, all of your efforts and dedications will fall through. It would be like you never even wanted to save your relationship. So, you are spinning in a circle without any reasonable decision. You don’t want to leave just like you are not for staying. A person that means enough to you  to stay is someone who can manipulate you and use all of your emotions against you. You know that person is using your energy which you don’t have much left. There are mixed feelings. You want to make your person happy and all he does is deject you. If you want to have any benefit, you need to turn away.

    There is nothing than distress in your life, and your person just doesn’t see it. You expect that someone will love you and keep you calm, but instead he left you with nothing. Actually, if anxiety and concern is something, then you have only that. You feel that most of the time you and your partner make one step forward, but take two back. He makes you feel almost dumpy, ugly, and not worthy.

    You give all of your time and you did your best to be correct and normal, yet you feel like he doesn’t love you at all. Your relationship is not full of love. A person you are with is making you feel helpless when you want to win him over, and you simply don’t see the way out. You are doing all you can to save the things that you know you cannot save. Is there any other choice than to turn away?

    While you are struggling with saving the relationship, your person keeps disappointing you daily. There is no effort of improving your connection, and you can’t do it all by yourself. You are waiting because you think that waiting is valuable and that eventually things will become better. Your person will become better. He will start to appreciate your time and your attempt to save something you once thought is the most valuable thing—your relationship. You are not sure if there is any chance left at all.

    You don’t want to turn away, even though if you know that you are the only one who loves and who is trying hard to save the relationship. Your person is treating you like you are not valuable at all, while you are forcing yourself to love him more and to believe that things will change. Is there any strength left in your heart to stand the drama that your person brings with? You tried but you failed at taking all of the failures that your person brings into a relationship. Your heart isn’t that strong. You don’t deserve to spend all of your time trying to save something you are not quite sure is worth saving anymore.

    You love your partner, but you end up thinking that you love yourself more. And you tried not to turn away, but you have no other option. Your partner didn’t give you reason to stay.

    You Don’t Want To Leave, But That’s The Only Option You Have

    About the author

    Kirsten Blackwood

    A mental health writer and advocate. Currently I write about depression. My work has always been centered around health as I previously worked at a variety of healthcare-focused agencies. I wanted to help people who were struggling with an illness or disability, but often times didn’t feel the work I was doing was providing the right voice to the people I was trying to help. Here, I can connect to you in your journey by encouraging you to share the good, the bad, and moments in-between.

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