When you find yourself in a narcissistic relationship with a toxic guy, that relationship leaves emotional scars on you for a very long period of time. During that relationship, you don’t even notice the emotional abuse you are going through. After the relationship ends, you are only then able to see clearly everything that you have been through. Obviously, you are too scared to move on. This is especially noticeable when it comes to entering new relationships and meeting new guys. It is understandable that you expect every guy to be the same, that you are pessimistic about your future relationships and that your self-confidence level is low. Here are seven things that will happen when you meet a nice guy after a narcissistic relationship.
You will expect the worst
After you finally give this new, nice guy a chance, expect to expect the worst. You expect every nice guy you meet after a narcissistic relationship to be the same as your ex. It is so because, unfortunately, you are used to these toxic patterns of behavior you had in your previous relationship. It’s perfectly reasonable that every guy in your head now appears the same.
You will overanalyze everything
You will question your every move. That is because you are afraid that you will do something wrong that will chase him away. You will be too careful and won’t be able to let things be. You will overthink every aspect of your new relationship and overanalyze your new boyfriend’s every move. And you will try to find signs of a narcissist in him.
You will think this is not the real him
After you realize that you have finally met a nice guy, you won’t believe him. You will think that is a toxic person as well, but that he is just hiding it well. He will simply seem too good to be true. You are not used to someone treating you this nicely, so you will think this is not the real him and that all of this is just part of an act.
You will try to push him away
When you meet a nice guy after a narcissistic relationship, your first impulse is to push him away. No matter how much you like him, fear caused by the emotional abuse you have been through will paralyze you. You think it’s better to push him away in the beginning when your feelings are still not as strong then to get hurt once again. You think that every relationship must end with your heartbreak and you want to avoid it from the start. But, if he is the one for you, he won’t let you push him away.
You will think you don’t deserve him
After you’ve seen that this guy doesn’t want to give up on you no matter what you do, you start to see that he really is nice and he really has deep feelings for you. This is when guilt comes. Your narcissistic ex-boyfriend made sure you feel guilty for all the problems in your relationship and for all the emotional abuse he put you through. So, now, you are scared that you will make the same mistakes again. You will need time to realize that things you went through in your previous relationship were not your fault and to start valuing yourself again. But don’t worry, when you meet a nice guy after a narcissistic relationship, your self-confidence will grow with time.
You will trust him
After all these stages and phases, you will finally see that this guy is worthy of your trust. He was there for you in your darkest hours and he never gave up on you and on your relationship. You finally see that he is nothing like your narcissistic, toxic ex-boyfriend. And you learn to trust him.
You will see what love really is
It is only now that you are able to see what love really is. Now, for the first time, you see how a guy who loves you should treat you and you see how a healthy relationship should look like. And now, more than ever, when you see what true love looks like, you are aware how severe emotionally abused you were.