Life Relationships

Are You Too Picky in Dating?

Too picky
Written by Selma

There are many girls who say they can’t find their luck in love, but nobody around them, including themselves can’t realize what seems to be the problem. These girls have a lot to offer, they are smart, good looking and have great personalities. But, they are always single.  If you are one of these girls, you may blame the male population for this situation. But, has it ever crossed your mind that you are searching for the solution of your problem in the wrong places.  It’s sometimes hard to admit, but maybe you are the problem. Don’t get me wrong, every girl deserves to be with the guy she likes and you are entitled to search for the right guy, but have you ever thought that maybe you are too picky when it comes to dating?

If you are one of those girls who always wants love, but never actually wants to meet anyone, maybe you are being too selective. Everyone is entitled to have their standards when it comes to a relationship, but if you met numerous guys and not one has satisfied your standards, they are not the problem. You see your friends and how easy they enter in new casual relationships. Nobody says that you should be like that, it’s ok to have standards, but you should maybe lower them a little bit.

You probably don’t like giving chances to many guys because you expect a movie romance. But, how can you know if you are missing out on your soulmate by turning down everybody? First of all, you should have realistic expectations. Of course, we all want a handsome, athletic guy who is educated and has a great personality. And of course, a guy that will treat us like princesses. But, let’s face it, it is difficult to find all of these qualities in one guy. If you feel a good vibe and have a good communication with a guy, you should definitely ignore some of his imperfections.

Hey, you are not perfect either. You should also have in mind that there are guys who are simply shy in the beginning. But, these guys often have a lot to offer if you just give them a chance. He may be the funniest guy ever behind that shy mask. And you will never know if you don’t try. The last thing you want is to regret about some guy that you put in the friend zone and turned down because you thought he wasn’t your type. You two maybe stayed friends and now you see how wonderful he is, but it’s too late.

Relationships are not science. You shouldn’t look at persons around you as equations of things you like about them and things you don’t like about them. The most important thing about a guy is the way he makes you feel. If you feel butterflies when you are with him, but he doesn’t fit your image of Mr. Perfect, don’t let him go and go for it.

Try to focus on positive things in life, including guys. When you think about a guy, try not to focus on his faults and think about his good sides. You need to understand that he is just human and has good and bad qualities. If he is not as handsome as you would like, but treats you nice, focus on that.

Another important thing is not to overthink and overanalyze. The more you think about your potential partner, you will keep noticing his flaws and imperfections. Try also not to overthink your future relationship. When you do this, you probably think of everything that could possibly go wrong and therefore, your relationship is doomed before it even started. Instead of picturing all the possible negative scenarios and alternatives, try to go with the flow once in your life. You can never know what is going to happen, so why not try?

This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t have criteria when it comes to guys and that you should be with every guy that comes on your way. We all have some deal breakers when it comes to our potential partners and potential relationships. It’s ok to have those deal breakers from the start because that is a way of showing that you know what you want. But, it’s important to know yourself in order to recognize when something is a deal breaker and when you are just being too picky.

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