Heartbreak Life Relationships

6 Reasons Why You Are Always The Victim In Relationships

Written by Chloe M.

You’re the one who is responsible. You’re the problem and you need to change and make adjustments to improve your situation.

You should consider this: you are the one who is constantly jumping from one relationship to another. You meet someone, you fall in love, you develop a routine, but then you start to grow apart and things eventually break down. This process keeps repeating like a broken record and it’s taking a heavy toll on your mind and heart.

But the worst part is that you feel lost. You don’t know how to fix it. Because you don’t know what is the problem. You don’t understand why things keep on going wrong and you wonder about how sad are you. Your friends are telling you that it’s just a matter of bad luck. They keep telling you that you’re dating the wrong people and that you are going to meet the right person. But understand this: they are just being nice to you and they don’t want to hurt you.

I’m not going to care about your feelings. I want to protect you from yourself. And here’s the truth: you are the problem. No luck is involved here.

That’s little unfair, maybe some luck is involved. Maybe some of the people that you date really are bad. But you should consider that out of all of your failed relationships, you are the common denominator here. The common factor is you. And now, you have to take a deep look at your personality and your character, you have to be able to reflect properly on how you conduct yourself. And see if your own actions are contributing to your own bad luck. Maybe you are the one who is victimizing yourself. If you manage to spot some flaws in your character, that’s a good thing. It means you are humble enough to acknowledge that you are imperfect. That there are some aspects of your personality that you need to improve on.

That is a good way to start. Here are 6 possible reasons why you are always the victim in relationships.

1. You blind yourself to the bad things.

You only look at the things that are good. Sometimes, you get your hopes up too high for a person or relationship and you end up blinding yourself to the reality of the situation. Even though there are so many red flags and bad signs you trick your mind into only acknowledging all of the good parts of the relationship. Pay attention.

2. You attract yourself to the wrong kind of partners.

You are choosing the people who are wrong for you to date. All the potentially good partners get ignored because you entertain people who are bad for you.

3. You fall in love with persons who are unavailable.

They can be physically and emotionally unavailable. You might be dating someone who is too far away from you or someone who is in another relationship.

4. You don’t step out of your comfort zone.

Maybe you never open yourself up to new approaches to love. Don’t refuse to step outside of your comfort zone. Maybe your comfort zone hasn’t necessarily been kind to you. Take a chance on something new. Don’t fail again what’s familiar to you.

5. You don’t allow yourself to become vulnerable.

You need to open yourself up in a relationship, so your partner will be able to trust you. Relationships allow a sense of vulnerability. Your relationship needs to grow. Give it space.

6. Or you just don’t know what you want out of your relationships.

You don’t know what are you looking for and that is why you end up becoming disappointed. You need to have a set of expectation for your partners and relationships. And you will have something to work towards to.


About the author

Chloe M.